I don't normally want to make a full post of vacations unless something special happens. Vacations are time to relax and forget the world. That's what I expected on this one, but three big things are worth noting. 1) Tiffany is a fine fine ride! 2) Being stuck on the side of the road for 20 hours sucks SO bad. 3) I told my friends about my queerness. Let's get into it.
For the past four months I've known that Tiffany is a smoother, better, ride when compared to Nina. Probably the best ride I've ever had. The only two bad things I can really say about Tiffany's ride is that as an SUV she's top heavy and her Turbos suck. It's jus such an extreme coming from Nina, who drove on rails and had almost no body roll whatsoever, to Tiffany who feels like she's tipping over even when turning at moderate speeds. And the turbos might give her that sweet sweet 335 horsepower and 380 lb-ft of torque but it doesn't come on in a linear or even smooth way.
So I thought it was a safe assumption that she'd be better on a trip down to Texas. That's just a pure understatement. She is SO comfortable to drive. I talked in a previous post about how in Ginger and Isabella I'd stop every hour or so to grab a tasty beverage or use the restroom. They were comfortable but if I look back, I was diabetes limited. My diabetes wasn't under good control then and while I thought it was better, I still drank a lot more than I needed and therefore used the bathroom a lot more. In Nina, I had to stop because she was just a punishing ride and made me ache (she broke my heart?). Tiffany? In Tiffany I EASILY went two hours between stops. My longest run was 4.5 hours and at that point it was my bladder that made me stop after drinking a 20 oz Gatorade and a 32 oz water. I never stopped because I needed to stretch. I never felt I needed to extend a stop so that I could move around and stretch. I never considered stopping for the day because I needed to get out of the car.
The only physical aspect that came into it at all were my arms and finding a comfortable place on the steering wheel. This is in part because of the longer times spent on the road but also because of the lane centering.
My normal hand position on a steering wheel is with my right hand at about 2 o'clock. I occasionally add my left hand at between 9 and 10 and let the weight of my arms keep me centered. On very rare occasions I'll simply drive with my left, raising it up to a full 10 o'clock position, but as my non-dominant arm I don't have the stamina to use that position for a long time. I mentioned in a previous post that with the lane centering doing about half of the driving for me, I will more often than not drive with my right hand gripping the wheel underhanded at around five o'clock (with my elbow firmly planted on the center arm rest). That's on my hour long work commute. On this trip I mixed it up with my left mirroring my right (underhand grip at 8 o'clock), or using my more 'normal' top of the wheel combination of grips. Maybe it was just holding it in those positions for hours at a time, but for whatever reason my arms ached a bit. Especially the right. It certainly wasn't a big deal as my hips, thighs, and back hurt a LOT more on previous trips, but I figured I should mention it.
Entertainment wise, Lincoln's system is the same as Ford's and hasn't changed since Ginger. I was hoping I'd get a better connection between the phone when I changed from an iPhone back to android but that didn't happen. Apple music seems to hate connecting to the car correctly if its not playing when connected. So if I happen to start off without it already in action I have to disconnect the phone, flip apple music off, turn it back on, play a song in the playlist I want, then hook it back to the car. Not great when I'm getting onto the highway, but whatever.
OH, one nice thing is the dashboard integration. The built in Navigation that Ginger, Isabella, and Nina had were all great. They'd not only show the trip turn by turn on the eight inch entertainment screen, they'd show the next turn and distance to it on the dashboard/guage-cluster. The problem was that once I got Isabella I started hooking my phone up to the car and using android auto (or apple car play). When I did that, I got better navigation on the center screen but it didn't integrate with the dashboard. Well, Tiffany takes my Google Maps directions and puts them up into the digital gauge cluster! It was so nice seeing my next turn and distance to it just above the speedometer. I know, I know, it's such a little thing to not have to turn my head 10 degrees over and 5 degrees down to look at the big 8 inch screen but still YAY!
So that's Tiffany being a fine ride. Now let's talk about being stuck on the side of the road.
It seems every time I drive down to Dallas there are more and more options on how to get there. Understand, I'm coming from mid-Michigan and ending up north of Dallas. Leaving mid-Michigan I can either head toward Chicago or Indianapolis. Entering Dallas I can approach from either Oklahoma or Arkansas. My two most commonly driven paths are this (and they reverse easily enough):
The Oklahoma route
94E to just south of Chicago to 55S to 70E through St Louis 44E to local highway 69S.
The Arkansas route
69S to Indianapolis to 70E to 57S around Memphis to 40E to 30E to local highway 380E.
Between 55/57 and 70 there are a couple varieties that'll work in either direction. I tend to now avoid Chicago as the traffic gets really bad there, no matter what time of day or day of the week it is. So Indianapolis to 70 then either St Louis or Memphis and on.
The last couple trips, Google Maps has become a real nag. It will push a route, even if I don't want it, just because it saves 5 minutes over 16 hour drive. So this time while driving down I knew I wanted to go through Arkansas. When it came up and gave me the warning that it was changing my route, I just glanced at the screen and made it pick the easterly most route. It warned me a couple times and even said my route was going to add an hour to my trip. Pfft... that's just a lie.
Except it wasn't a lie. I have no idea why it even offered it up, but it directed me this way: 69S to Indianapolis to 65S around Loisville to Nashville to 40E. And yea, it added an hour to my trip. I can normally get to near Memphis in my first day of 10 hours and find a hotel near there. Well, with Tiffany being so cushy and me being able to push harder with less stops I made it with the 'hour longer' trip in about the same amount of time as I'd have done in Nina and still ended up near Memphis. The problem is the population drop off west of Memphis. There's hotels aplenty right there, but then you go quite awhile before you get to another good hotel.
As I exited Memphis and entered Arkansas (technically in West Memphis), I made sure to pull off, gas up, get some tasty beverages, and check the maps. I had hotels 30 minutes down that would be fine. It was just before 10 o'clock local time (11 o'clock by my body's eastern timezone clock) and I figured that would make a good trip. There was even a safeguard as another group of hotels were 15 minutes further down the highway. When getting back onto the highway, my plans for the entire vacation went up in smoke.
I hit a pothole. A big deep pothole. On the entrance ramp to the highway my tire pressure warning went off. Tire pressure on the left rear was down to 20 pounds. At that point I'm honestly not sure I could have done much. I certainly couldn't have turned around, but I guess I could have stopped then and there. But I didn't and instead decided I could drive on 20 pounds to the next exit. About a mile down the highway I hear the tire pressure warning go off again. Having alrady been warned, I paid more attention to the semi I was passing and only looked at the dash when I was safely in front of him going 75 miles per hour.
The dash said I had 5 pounds of pressure in the passenger rear tire. Fuck.
I got off the road as quickly and safely as possible. There wasn't much of a shoulder (fucking Arkansas) but I was completely off the highway with about half a car width to spare. Close enough that I could feel the car rock when semis pass by, far enough that I wasn't scared of getting hit. At least not TOO scared. When I got out I still timed it with traffic though. Moving around to the rear I looked at the tire and immediately knew I was in it. The tire was separated from the wheel and had NO pressure.
Having been raised 'right' by my father I went into fix-it mode and started getting ready to change the tire. While pulling my two bags, work bag, laptop, extra shoes, and trunk organizer out of the back so that I could access the spare and jack I had the time to realize I haven't changed a tire since 1995. Seriously. I just haven't had a flat in 26 years. At the time I figured I'd at least have a little adventure and a story to tell.
When I finally got the spare and jack out, I realized that the quarter century gap might be hurting me as there was no wrench. The whole setup, spare tire and jack, looked brand new so it didn't make sense to not have a jack... but maybe I was just missing it? When in doubt, RTFM. I pulled the manual from the glove box and it said to turn the jack's nut and the wrench would fall out. Evidently the wrench is now the square black part in the middle of the jack and yes... it did come out easily. Of course I had no idea how to take this straight squared off piece of metal and turn it into a angled wrench when it hit me... I pay quite a bit through several services for roadside assistance. Roadside assistance like a tire change.
Screw this, it's been about 12 hours of driving. I'm allowed to be lazy and let someone else do this while I sit and take pictures.
I have three roadside assistances that I knew I could use. Likely more. Lincoln itself has roadside assistance through their warranty (and the extended warranty I bought). My insurance has roadside assistance. The tire and wheel warranty I bought has roadside assistance. I picked the Lincoln one as I figured it would be the most accommodating system. It was easy enough as you now use their app to start a roadside emergency claim. They called me back in a few minutes and started by confirming that I and my vehicle were safe and that there were no medical emergencies. Once that was established and they knew what I needed... just a tire change... they got my location (not as easy as it sounds) and said they'd get a service truck (tow truck) to me within an hour.
I know people that would scoff at waiting for an hour, but I didn't think that was bad for 10 o'clock at night. I packed everything up, took some photos, and waited. When I finally got a call from the tow truck driver he said he was 30 minutes away. He established the problem, confirmed that I had a good spare, and then asked if I had locking lug nuts. Shit. I got out and looked and indeed I have locking lug nuts. He naturally wanted to confirm that I had the key lug nut and searching for that took me a good 20 minutes. I had to completely un pack everything again to look under the rear floor and no, I did NOT have the key.
Upon later thinking about it, I have to be pissed at Belle Tire. Remember, I got new tires a week after buying Tiffany and they never mentioned the locking lugs. They either took my key or they used a universal and just didn't mention that I didn't have one. Either way, Dick Move Belle!
Anyway, I got ahold of he driver and he said he didn't have any universal keys so he would be unable to change the tire. Fine. I figured I'd now need the Lincoln dealership to get a key. Maybe a wheel/tire place would work, but I thought I 'd have better luck with the Lincoln dealership, especially if the wheel needed replaced. But the driver wouldn't take me to the nearby dealership (Memphis only has one Lincoln dealership) as they lock their lot and he "can't just drop my car off on the side of the road".
That didn't exactly please me but I took it in stride. If we can't do that, he could certainly come get me and take me to a motel. I could leave my car there overnight and get it towed to the dealership in the morning.
No.
He said he couldn't drop the car off unless he knew he had permission and since I wasn't at the hotel, I didn't have permission. I tried to argue with him for a few minutes but I was quickly losing my calm. It was now past one in the morning and I was tired. I finally hung up on him as it was clear he wasn't going to help, especially when he said he was now an hour and a half away from me. In other words he had already made up his mind that he couldn't help and was driving away, toward another job. Fuck him.
It took me another hour to get a Lyft driver to come pick me up (evidently they are uninterested in being directed to pick someone up from the side of the highway) and then 10 minutes to the hotel. I hadn't had dinner so I had a few bites of a microwave enchilada (disgusting) and went to bed at two thirty.
The dealership opened up at nine o'clock so I called them at three minutes past. I confirmed that he'd be able to get me in, take a look at it, make sure the wheel was safe and if not order me a new one, and of course get me a new tire. The service advisor was very accommodating and seemed to genuinely want to help. He even said he'd get me in before some other cars as I was just passing through.
I had a couple bits of a blueberry muffin so my pills weren't taken on an empty stomach and a couple sips of coffee as it just tasted bad, then headed out. It took me another hour to get a driver to drop me off at my car and then start the new tow process. At least this time I knew it would be a tow. I also knew it wouldn't be the fastest in the world as Tiffany requires a flat bad (all wheel drive cars shouldn't be towed with two wheels on the road). Basically half the tow trucks out there weren't available to me. Anyway, I got ahold of Linocln and they said it would be an hour and a half. Their app actually had a countdown so I was getting excited as 90 minutes approached. And then passed. 15 minutes after the 90 minute mark, I got a text from Lincoln asking if I'd been picked up. When I replied that I had in fact NOT been picked up they quickly said they'd call and find out what the delay was. A few minutes later they replied saying it would now be another 30 minutes but the tow was on its way.
I won't go over every iterations of this, but it was repeated several times. 30 minutes pass, 15 more minutes pass, they ask, I reply, they look into it, they say it will take 30 more minutes, rinse/repeat. Around two PM (yes... I'd been back out at the car for 4 hours at that point!) I called them back up and directly asked what was taking so long. To their credit, the woman who answered the phone was apologetic and very courteous, agreeing with me that this was taking far to long. When she called back I think I could hear her blushing and embarrassment. It seems the tow truck had been broken all day and the towing company though they could fix it so they kept asking for extensions. If Lincoln had simply called them and not relied on their automated service, they could have worked on deploying another tow truck. I don't blame the tow company asking for more time, I blame Lincoln on allowing them more time.
The woman at Roadside Assistance assured me she'd contact another tow company and get me out of there as soon as possible. When she called back she was again apologetic, but said it would be another 90 minutes. Fine. 90 minutes and no more. 105 minutes later they texted and asked if I'd been picked up. I didn't even bother responding and instead called them. Again, they were very apologetic and said they'd call and find out waht the delay was. I reminded them that now at well past four o'clock I'd been stuck on the side of the road for 4 hours last night and six hours today and because they couldn't get this done I might be stuck all night as the dealership might not be able to get me in.
I was clearly angry but holding it in. Until she called back. She couldn't reach the towing company. The driver, who she had spoken to directly, wasn't answering his phone and the tow dispatcher wasn't answering the company phone. She was going to get me a tow, but it might be another couple hours. I slipped easily from angry to furious. I'm embarrassed to say that I took out all of my frustrations on this poor woman who was doing nothing but trying to help me. But I couldn't stop myself. I even mentioned that if I'd have known it was going to take all day I could have easily spent a wondaful day in Memphis but I'd been stuck in my car with the promise of 30 minute service over and over again.
To her credit, she took my wrath like a champ. I don't know if this is just her being a pro at customer service and being an empathic human being, or if this is what 'Lincoln' level service is as opposed to 'Ford' level service. Regardless she said she'd try to get me another tow but suggested I also try and that if I could get one faster they'd reimburse me. I agreed and hung up. Yeah, I was still being petty and pissy.
I called he dealership and he was doubtful that anybody could get me to him before his department was closed. He said that I could drop it off until six but even that would be cutting it close. Regardless if I dropped it off or got it towed to him in the morning, he'd get me out of there as fast as possible. I already knew he didn't have a tow service himself, but asked him what one he used. I called up the service he suggested and I swear to the Goddess, I had a tow truck out to me 45 minutes later. That's the same time that Lincoln texted and said they had a tow heading my way. I answered with a picture of Tiffany on the back of the truck and "Nevermind, I'll send you the bill".
A quick aside, my blood sugar was dropping all day. I had no breakfast beyond the couple bites of muffin and didn't even have a cup of coffee, a soda, or anything other than water while waiting in the car. When I started feeling dizzy I took my blood sugar and it was down to 55. That's bad. That's dangerous.
Another quick aside, I have such great friends. All that time spent in the car wasn't bad as I was texting with a friend, texting with family, and logging onto discord to talk to some of my 'Caitlyn' friends there. Everybody helped keep me sane and I love them all for it!
The driver isn't supposed to take passengers but he was kind enough to take me. I think they knew they were going to fleece me for everything they could as I'd already made it clear that while they'd get my credit card, Lincoln was ultimately picking up the tab. Instead of a $100 tow, it was a $250 tow (out of state, extra miles, passenger...). I was still appreciative and asked him to just take me to a nicer hotel near the dealership where I could get them to take me the last few miles in the morning (he'd already said he couldn't get me to the dealership in time).
I should be careful on the impression I make. I'm sure as a Mustang driver or even a Fusion driver, a 'nicer' hotel would have been the Best Western, the Holiday Inn Express, or if he was feeling very fancy, the actual Holiday Inn. He instead took me to the Marriot. Not only was the room fee $200 instead of the $100 I wanted to pay, they had no free services. Dinner at the bar with a single Moscow Mule was $25. A soda and water at their convenience area was $10. They had no coffee in the room and it would have cost $10 for a cup at the bar in the morning. The muffin, Gatorade, and water instead cost me $20.
But you know what? Fuck it. Lincoln is going to pay for this, even if they don't know it yet.
After a decent nights sleep, I called the tow company again and they got a truck out to me in 30 minutes. This guy was far less helpful. First, I could barely understand him. It wasn't a southern accent or his mask, he just plain mumbled. I finally made it clear that yes I'd like him to take mee as well as the car to the dealership. He seemed fine with that, but then he actually had me drive Tiffany up onto the back of his truck.
Lemme be clear, there is NO way his company should be okay with that. I could easily drop my car off the side of his truck and take out both vehicles. Even a little slip up could damage my vehicle. All of which they'd be legally responsible for. BUT after the past day, I wasn't going to make a fuss or wait any longer and I'm a good enough driver to do it safely. Once on the back of his truck I went to get out but he had me wait in Tiffany while he fastened her on and lifted the back up to its upright position. He had me wait longer when I tried to get out while he got into the cab and started writing something down.
I honestly figured he was writing up the bill and seeing how much he could add to it for driving me along with the car (another $150 passenger fee?). But while I texted and messaged everybody that I was on me way he put it into drive and started down the road.
With. Me. In. My. Car. On. The. Back. Of. His. Truck.
I mean, sure, I've never seen a tow truck drop a car off the back before. And sure, if he was in an accident bad enough to hurt me back here, I'd probably also be hurt if I was in his cab... but again I'm positive his company would not be good with the legal liability he put them in with me in the back like that.
Whatever, this day HAD to get done and it's not like I could do anything. He didn't even take the main road, he went to the damned highway, so I got to see the world from that raised position at 55 miles per hour. When we got to the dealership it was no surprise that he had me drive off the back of his truck. I paid the bill and drove Tiffany into the service entrance.
After going over what happened with the service advisor, the same SA I'd spoken with the day before, he said he'd get me in next and assuming the wheel wasn't damaged he could get me out by noon. A two hour turn around. Not bad at all! The one delay would be the actual tire. I have Michelin Pilot Sport All-Season 4 tires. They're not cheap, especially in that size. The SA said his tire guy can definitely get me something to fit, but it might not specifically be the Pilot Sport All Season 4s. It would be Michelin, but it might not match exactly.
Fine. Just get it done. I waited in their lobby for a couple hours (I didn't realize it until it was done, but I actually waited in the more exclusive 'Black Label' waiting area) and contacted my tire/wheel warranty and Roadside Assistance. The tire warranty said it would be no problem to get it covered at the dealership and to just have the SA give them a call when he was ready. The Roadside Assistance failed me again.
I technically had two issues with them. First and most obviously, I needed to find out how to get reimbursed for the tows and hotel. But secondly I needed to fix my name. You see, every time they called me back they were asking for 'Sarah'. I imagine 'Sarah' was the previous owner, but it's clearly not me. When I called them I hit an immediate wall. This was no 'Lincoln' level service as she said they don't reimburse for tows. Nope. Not at all. Not even a bit. Sorry. Out of Luck. She just had no fucks to give. Which naturally sent me from calm and almost happy to enraged all over. I knew I wasn't going to get through to her so I moved on (knowing I'd come back to another person later for the money) to the name. She had the same attitude, basically saying it wasn't her problem. She then transferred me "to the department that can fix that".
That department was the extended warranty department. The extended warranty department has my name correctly and he even admitted that he had no idea what she could have expected him to do. I kept as calm as I could as this guy hadn't done anything other than accept the call, and asked him to transfer me back. He then screwed up and sent me to 'Ford Roadside Assistance'. Initially I didn't think this would be a problem as Lincoln is a subsidiary of Ford but it makes a clear difference. First, I'd never waited longer than 2 minutes before I was speaking to a person when calling anything with the name 'Lincoln' associated with it. I waited for 20 minutes to talk to someone here. Second, they couldn't help me as my VIN didn't bring up a Ford vehicle. They were clear in that Ford and Lincoln Roadside Assistance are run out of the same company (a third party company I'm sure) but are not run AS the same company and they don't have access to the same records.
So I had to call back. I won't lie, I was having a tough time holding in my frustration. I'd been stranded for 20 hours. I'd had a full day removed from my 3 day vacation. I'd had to fix the problem and pay for it out of pocket and at this point wanted to simply get it reimbursed... not because I though ti was proper to reimburse me for it but because they said they'd reimburse me. And now I was just getting the run around.
I laid into the poor woman who answered the phone. Three times I had to actually lower my voice because I recognized I was getting to loud for a public place. This woman had to be related to the woman I spoke with the previous day because she was not only seemingly genuinely apologetic, she seemed surprised that the previous people I'd spoken to hadn't been able to help me. Yes, they would reimburse me for the tows. She got me email address and said she'd get the forms sent out to me as soon as she could but that it could take up to 24 hours (it hit my email an hour later!). She looked into her system to see what to do about changing the name but admitted, again apologetically, that she couldn't change it. That in fact I needed to contact the dealer to change it over.
When I got done with the phone call I knew I'd been too loud as I had two other people in the waiting area watching me with smiles, nodding their heads.
The SA came out and got me at Noon. I'd have been out of there exactly as he predicted except instead of paying and getting reimbursed from the tire warranty later, I just had him deal with it. It was very clear he didn't want to do this. He was one man running a two man operation and was being pulled in a dozen different directions, but to his credit he got it done with only a single request that I call the tire warranty and get reimbursed later. Once I said no, he got it done. It took an hour, but I don't blame him for that as he had to jump through a dozen different hoops. In the end, I paid a $40 shop fee (he removed the locking lugs and replaced them, so I had no problem paying that fee) and the warranty covered the remaining $550. Oh, and the SA's tire guy got a perfectly matching tire.
Once we were all paid up he admitted that the car needed an alignment. It was safe to drive and would get me to Dallas just fine, but their machine was broke. He'd tried to find a local service that could get me in and get it done quickly but all of them had hours long waits and he knew I wanted to get on the road. He tried until he hit his own promised time of noon. It wasn't bad enough to warrant getting it done immediately so I got it done while in Dallas.
So yeah.... that all happened.
And finally, since at least 2017 I've wanted to tell my best friends about my sexual identity. It seemed all important and not important at all. It's important because it's who I am and as my best friends, they deserve to know that. It's not important as it won't affect anything in our relationship... I will still be the same me that they've always liked.
On our trip to New Orleans, I chickened out. On our trip to Dallas and San Fran, I chickened out. On our trip to Dallas, I chickened out. Well, I wasn't going to do so again. Or at least that's what I told myself. We got through the whole weekend without it coming up because something like that doesn't just come up. On the night before I was to leave I waited for a slow moment in the conversation and just pushed through. "I have to tell you both something."
I should add that this is with A and his wife J. E wasn't there. I considered not saying anything on this weekend because I'd like to tell E at the same time, but that would just be chickening out again. Once I said that, I was no committed. We're good friends and I wouldn't be able to lie my way out of a statement like that. "I have to tell you both something." couldn't be followed up with something like "I really like my car" or "I don't like Star Trek anymore". It was important.
I don't want to go to deep into this as it's... well, it's personal. It's my friendships and I treasure them. BUT, I wanted it known far and wide (as far and wide as this little blog goes) that I finally got over that hump. There are two good friends that know me. All of me. And they didn't blink or have any problem with it whatsoever.
I can't express properly how relieved I am.
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