To be clear, it's not because less is happening. I think I actually have more going on now. BUT, this work schedule is going to take time to get used to. But more on that below, I just wanted to give a heads up that the Update posts won't be coming every other week any longer.
Health
Migraines have improved. Not back to my previous 'good' baseline, but better than this recent dip. I had one just the past couple days, both work days. I called in on the first day but went in on the second day. If I was working alone, I'd have had to go home as there was no way I could think clearly enough to be near patients. Thankfully, I have a work partner and she took over the patient side of things while I did the paperwork and prep stuff.
The Dr. still hasn't got me the new migraine med, Elyxyb. On the first attempt the insurance company simply refused it, so they're trying again. I also had to ask them to send my prescription of Qulipta to my new pharmacy. Being a new pharmacy and new insurance they of course needed a new prior authorization. The pharmacy said there was nothing that I needed to do, that they'd request the prior authorization. After a couple days of nothing happening, I sent a message to my doctor that I needed the prior authorization, that the pharmacy said I didn't need to do anything but that I'd never seen a pharmacy get a prior authorization. It'd always come from the doctor's office. Well lo and behold, an hour later and I got a voicemail from the pharmacy saying that THEY got me the prior authorization and the med would be shipped out soon. Of course my doctor's office had sent the authorization request in and got an immediate result. So yeah, I'm already disliking the 'honesty' of my pharmacy. But hey, they only give me the medications that keep me alive, right?
Mental health wise, I'm doing really well. I don't see my psychiatric NP until July but I'm fairly sure I'll be asking her if we can lower the Paxil dose. Therapy continues to help. Even the day I go, I feel a boost in my overall mood. And that boost doesn't just last for days, it lasts for weeks. I found out that my therapist is outside of my insurance's network so I might be screwed on payments. We'll have to see as they just tried charging it and I haven't heard anything back yet.
I have my continuous glucose monitors back so I can keep track of my blood sugars a lot better. Now that I'm constantly peeking and seeing what things like work do to me, I'm finding that my blood sugar is doing really good. I'd bet that my A1C will be vastly improved at my net Endocrinologist visit in August.
The only other thing going on health wise is an unusual rash. It's on both of my elbows. It started on my left side and almost felt more like a bug bite. Very itchy and very pin pointed. But a couple days later it spread out all over my elbow. Red, raised bumps, itchy. then a couple days later, it came up on my right elbow. Red, raised bumps, itchy. The only 'change' recently has been work. Maybe I'm having a reaction to the arm rests on the chairs at work? These last few days I worked, I tried avoiding putting my arms on the rests but it's awkward to avoid them. I'll have to just keep an eye on them.
Oh, one other thing. Not really new, but a continuation of what I've been going through. I'm still losing weight. I know that my 'gut' has shrunk down a lot. I mean, it's now to the point that when I inject insulin, it's more of in a fold of skin instead of a flat (er... rounded) area of belly fat. This morning though, I woke up kind of leaning to my right while on my back. When I brought my left arm down to lay on my chest, it landed on my lower rip cage... and then FELL down to my belly. It wasn't a small drop either. Like five inches between my ribs and my abdomen. Now yes, I still have most of my belly and it had embarrassingly mostly just rolled over to the right with gravity... but it used to be big enough that even when it 'rolled' it still met my ribs all around. This morning I could touch my lower rip, move 'down' to my belly, trace that down, and then trace 'up' to my hip bone. Weird.
Finances
Things are going well money wise. I'm both making as much as I used to and less than I used to. I mean, per hour, with my hourly and night differential, get plenty more than I was getting per hour. BUT, I only work 72 hours a pay period. Losing 8 hours of pay isn't something I can miss and not notice.
I've had enough checks that I figured out what I can pay R for keeping care of mom (I literally line item it on my spreadsheet as 'Mom Care'. I was paying him $400 before I started the job. We all knew that couldn't have been sustained as I was living off savings a the time, but it was where we began. I now hate that I built up that he'd get a raise when I started getting paid. But with my car payment, cell phone, and everything, I don't make much more than I was taking out of savings each 'pay period'. I've increased R to $400 every other pay period and $100 on the alternate pay periods, but that's it. Because I feel that I'm somehow gypping him out of promised money, I'm giving him half of my sign on bonuses as they come in. Sometime this month I should get my first $3,000 payment.
I'm still getting used to a lot of new things when it comes to finances. One is having a health savings account. I decided to put $150 away each pay period. Hell, the co-pays on my drugs generally run more than that, let alone all my doctor's visits and such. It's my first time using it so I was kind of surprised to see that it came with a credit/debit card and had a 'limit' of this years $1,800. That's saving me at least a bit on taxes and I should easily use all of it. If that keeps up, I can reduce the amount I 'spend' each pay period as that's always included enough to cover random medical co-payments.
Family/Friends
Not much here. While I'm getting accustomed to work, I haven't talked to A or E. As I also haven't heard from them, I assume they're doing fine.
B is doing... better? He's able to work most days. I still worry about him.
R seems to be doing well.
Mom is okay.
Work
I'm fully off orientation and on my own shifts. I work with S, a fellow admissions RN on the same days and the same shift. We also share most of our shift with C, another RN that works from 3pm to 3am (S and I work 7pm to 7am). I've also run through a full pay period so I've experienced the 'five days off' and am now in the middle of the 'three days off'. Between working nights and flipping to and from 'normal' dayshift life on days off, I feel like there isn't much time. At the same time, he five days off seems a bit extreme.
So far, I get up Sunday afternoon and leave home at 6pm to be at work by 7pm. I leave work around 7:30am and get home around 8:30. Eat a bit, then sleep, then wake up and repeat. Since I don't do much of anything for me, I look at that three day shift as going to work Sunday afternoon and then waking up Wednesday afternoon. Nothing happened (in my personal life) Sunday, Monday, or Tuesday. I don't sleep in Wednesday until my normal 4pm so I don't get a full 'nights' sleep. I then get tired and go to sleep a round 10 or 11pm. BUT since I wasn't awake all that long, I don't sleep for that long and end up waking up around 3 or 4am. The days then vibe like that until I have to prep for my next shift. In that instance, I next work Monday night. I want to sleep all day Monday, so I have to stay up all night Sunday, so I have to get a two or three hour nap in Sunday afternoon.
What that comes down to is that after three days on, I have a day of 'sleep'. I then have two or 4 days off with a very late night on the last night. Then it's back to the grind. It's not difficult and I can certainly do this long term but it doesn't vibe with my normal schedule. It helps that the job isn't physically demanding at ALL.
On the co-worker front, S and I get along great. She's a few years younger than me, but in that young Gen X, older Millennial vibe. She's a worker. We both like to DO so we get along great. The rest of the team is looking worse and worse. A and L who share our days of work just on the 7am to 7pm shift, are NOT workers. They're not DOers. When C comes in at 3pm, both A and L just check out and let her finish the rest of their shift. When S and I get there A and L will complain about their day in the place of giving report. It doesn't matter if they were slammed all shift or if there was only one admission all day, they'll complain about it as if they really had to put themselves out. There isn't much ever left for S and I but that's because C is there working on it. But whenever S and I leave anything for them, no matter how well prepped it is, they act like we took a big shit on their chairs.
So yeah, I'm not a fan.
I also heard through the saddest train of information that they believe I come in smelling too much of smoke. This is the very first I've heard about it. I did hear S mention that once, but she also said that her son is asthmatic and she's used to being very sensitive to things that might set him off. And she's never mentioned it since (even when she did mention it, she was just like "whoa, you're a smoker aren't you?" and that was primarily because it surprised her that she hasn't noticed weeks earlier).
Evidently A and L made a joke, saying that maybe the reason my Migraines are so bad is because I 'smoke like a chimney'. They also said that they would go to our supervisor (the director of admissions) to see if she'd make me hang my coat up somewhere else. Now, the way I heard this is what pisses me off. Understand, if people don't like that I smoke, if the smell bothers them, I can deal with that. I don't want my smoking to piss anybody off. They just need to understand a few things, like there isn't anything they can do to make me quit smoking. That no matter what efforts I take, there WILL be some odor of smoke about me. And that importantly, I do NOT smoke like a chimney. I smoke a little less than a pack a day. Way less on work days. Let's just assume since they've been near me for three months now, that they're only noticing it because my jacket smells of smoke more than my coat does.
Anyway, they shared all of this with C and asked if she'd tell me. C, for whatever reason, didn't feel comfortable telling me any of this and instead shared it with S, saying that S and I had a better working relationship. I get A and L not being willing to bring it up to me. They're all big and strong and have big and strong opinions.... when they're away from those they're talking about. They wouldn't have a spine when they talk to me directly. But C is a headstrong woman. The ONLY thing I can think of is that she considered telling me about it that day, but it was the day that I had a terrible migraine. That wouldn't be a good day for anybody to tell me any thing. Though to be fair, Sophia had no problem bringing it up to me.
You see, C brought it up to S and asked her to tell me because we have a 'good working relationship'.
I'd have addressed it immediately (through email since A and L and I only work together for a few minutes each day), but again, it was a bad migraine day and that would be bad for me to address anything when I feel like that.
In the grander scheme, I'm finding that most people at this hospital are like that though. Complainers, non-workers, whiners. The techs (technically they're called BHAs), the nurses, the supervisors, the managers... hell even the executives. This does not bode well for my long term employment... though it DOES bode well for my long term job security. To put it in more simple but insulting terms... I'll be one of the few Alphas in a sea of betas. I'll own the joint.
Entertainment
I got stuck on a long series of watching movies. Don't get me wrong, I like watching movies, but it's not the same kind of enjoyment as getting into a good series. I finished off the Bond movies and have a better appreciation for the Daniel Craig movies... though its hard to compare them against the previous movies as all of those go together as one story while all previous actors had a bunch of one off movies with very little to do with each other.
I bought a couple movies on sale including a 50 pack from Lionsgate for $25. I also picked up the recent remake of Red Sonja (haven't watched it yet) and the Vietnam War movie where they fight Russian made Dinasaurs, Primative War (SOOOOOOOO BAAAADDD).
Most thankfully, I picked up watching 'The Rookie' the other day. The eight season is all but done so I can start watching it now and it will be finished by the time I get to the 18th episode. I'm only six episodes in, but it's good so far.
New Tech
This area of the updates will probably be getting a boost as I start buying stuff again.
First up comes work. It's so freaking boring there that I took my Kindle Paperwhite Signature edition to leave at work. Yes, I'm reading enough to warrant having a kindle there and not just my phone. I also bought a little phone charger and it's just the cutest little thing!
Yes, you see that right. The little charger has a purple bow on it along with 'shoes' that protect the plug. And on that LCD Screen it mentions? It shows a face when it's plugged in, smiling when it's actively charging.
I'll talk more about the keyboard below, but I need to get a light to shine ON my keyboard. I don't want something that will be in my direct eyesight nor do I want something that will cast a bunch of glare on my screen... so I went with a hanging light. This is a simple tiffany style stained glass shade with a smart bulb in it that will hang roughly over my head. It'll be out of direct view and I can keep the light low enough that it'll neither glare on the screen but still illuminate the keyboard. I just have to have R help me drill the holes to hang it up then run the electrical cord along the ceiling and down the corner of the room to the wall to plug in.
For the longest time I've had two smart lights in my room. One is a smart bulb from Lifx. It's in another tiffany style stained glass desk lamp that sits next to my bed (but still behind the big ass screen!). It's what I'd call the primary light in my room. Then, behind the TV screen, I had a Govee set of lights that are designed to be behind a TV. They shine at the wall and have this diffuse light. The only problem was that through the Google Home app or the Govee app, I couldn't get them to simply cycle through colors. Ideally I'd like to set up a handful of colors to cycle through (pink, cyan, violet...) but I'd accept fully cycling through the rainbow. they just didn't do it. So, I decided to replace those Govee lights with a Lifx light. The damned Lifex light cost $80, but along with the smart bulb I bought for the ceiling lamp, I'll be all Lifx. And you know what? While the light does have a very nice color cycle system, it will NOT remember it. Whatever color the light is when I turn it off, it will turn back on at that color and just sit there. I then have to pull up the app and turn the color cycle back on.
So, somehow I got a new fancy Lifx light to replace my Govee lights that only had limited colors to cycle through, that doesn't color cycle at all. FUCK.
Writing
I should add a whole post about writing in general and You're Not The Boss Of Me in particular. I'm entering the last stage of writing it and I think I'm at the fun part. And yes, I've burned through the block that was holding me back. I wrote a pretty hot scene of Paris stuck under Mal's desk. No, it wasn't a blow job scene, but it was a hand job scene that ended in a facial. I'm just about to have her trip with Darnell that may as well be called her Blow Job vacation.
The main stumbling block now is just time. With work taking up half the week and me not wanting to ONLY write, I get a couple chapters out each week and that's it.
Michigan Football
Just waiting until those magical crisp fall days.
New Car
I still consider Tatiana my possible long term car. I can't think of a better car to get to replace her... except for a newer Lincoln Nautilus. You see, the 2026 model has a slightly newer version of Blue Cruise. My version is fine. Great even. But if it has to slow down behind someone the most it will do on its own is remind me that a lane change is possible. If I just sit there in my seat it will gladly stay in its lane and go five, ten, or twenty miles an hour slower. The new version, if it slows down enough and has a clear lane, will move over and pass all on its own.
There are a few problems with the 2026 models vs my 2025. One, the price went up. Two, as much as I put down on Tatiana, she still depreciated a TON in that first year. Three, they only offer a 'blue' interior in the black label now.
But, I'm not so sure that all would stop me. I'm not so excited about having a white car again. It's just not as 'yay' as I want. Don't get me wrong, Tatiana looks fine. Good even. But white is just so 'normal'. The Nautilus looks so much better in Red and I've even got used to the Blue. With the Red, it has a Grey interior that works well enough. It's about as flashy as the Blue I currently have since the Blue isn't obvious or anything. And for the Blue Nautilus, it has a really sweet brown interior.
Those would be the only color combinations that I would consider moving to. Blue with a brown interior, Red with a grey interior. But it doesn't matter as I only have about $9,000 of value in my Tatiana and maybe $2,000 that I could put down. MAYBE $4,000 after my bonus.
Oh wait... what's that? Lincoln is having their employee pricing for all again?
Well fuck, all bets are off and I'm car shopping again.
Apple Music Spotify
I'm not going to write up a big bit here, but I just want to put it out there that I'm giving serious consideration to changing over to Spotify from Apple Music. Apple Music is just pissing me off more and more. For instance, I've been listening to my 'Good Tunes' playlist all morning (for about 4 hours now) and it's stayed random but only in the upper portion of the playlist. The newer songs. I have this playlist specifically because it has ALL my songs on it. New and Old.
It's been doing the same thing in the car too. Yesterday it got stuck in a playlist shuffling between only 3 songs.
And most annoyingly, I can't run Apple Music natively in Tatiana. I have to run it through my phone. That's damned annoying when I turn my phone to do not disturb at work.
It won't be now, but I think I'm going to set up a Spotify account again and give it another try along side Apple Music. If I like it, I'll then move to make it the default music system in the house as Mom will need to use it for her sleep sounds as well. If it works there, then I can cancel Apple Music for the first time since the pandemic.
Keyboard
And finally, the keyboard. No, I haven't purchased a new keyboard. But I did get a major improvement. All metal keycaps. I've LOVED the metal keycaps I had for the arrow keys and the escape key. Well, now I have blue 'Moon Landing' all metal keycaps everywhere else. They don't let the lights shine through them and that's why I need to shine light on the keyboard.
I'm about 98% done setting it up, but want to finish this last part before I call it done. And for that I'll at least need the light but likely also need these extra keycaps I bought (coming from China, they take about a week). Once I have this last 2%, I'll make another post and have some pictures.
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