Happiness Found (Short story and Cap)

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Surprising and unexpected happiness

So I've written about several ways that I try to inspire my own moods.  About how I try to nudge myself in the correct direction to get myself ready to work on a graphic, write and/or cap.

But all of that is used with the assumption that I am in a 'normal' mood.  A flat, not too happy, not too sad state of mind.  And to be honest I hadn't given that much thought until this afternoon.  Because I am in a very rare state... at least rare for me over the past few years.

I'm happy.

I'm not 'glad' that I had a kind of interview earlier this week.  I'm not glad that my birthday passed without much fanfare (which is how I prefer it).  I'm not even glad that I'm working this weekend (I didn't work 2 out of the last 4 weeks).  I'm just... happy.  I'm in a good mood.  The things that normally bring me down are still here and are still as serious and impending as they were yesterday.  I've done absolutely nothing to even work toward eliminating those things (I did buy a lottery ticket, but that didn't do it).  If I listed out the differences between yesterday and today I couldn't point to a single thing that would help predict that today would be a good mood day.

It just is.

Handler Bio

Sorry that I've been absent for awhile on this project.  A lot of things worked together to sap any creativity I had, but I'm putting that behind me and forging ahead.  I don't think I have a lot more 'prep' work to do before diving into writing.  If things go well, I should start that part early next week.  My goal is to have at least part of a chapter done and posted here by January 30th (next Wednesday).

But before I get there, I still have to flesh out some of the other characters, and finish with the outline.  I will say that I'm going to take Rauk's advice and not flesh out the outline completely.   I don't want to lock myself into a narrative that may change as I write out the Main Character's actions and reactions to what's happening.

New Story Idea

I know, I know.  I haven't even really started this story so I shouldn't focus on another.  But I wanted to write this idea out so that I can hopefully come back to it later and maybe make it another project.

You know I've always been a big fan of the 'Good Guy in the Wrong Place' scenario.  Normally this manifests itself in a person getting transformed (or at least convincingly dressed and made over) and having to fool people around him.  At the same time that he doesn't want to be female, he has to convince others that he IS female... often sexually... or risk losing something (his girlfriend/wife, his good friends, his business...).  But every step he makes to convince people of his femininity he makes it harder and harder to ever get back to 'normal' and even ups the stakes as to what he will lose if he's found out.

That always makes me melt into a little puddle when I read it or even think about it.  But there's another side of that scenario.

Personal Inspiration

I wrote in an earlier post how I'll use music, movies and even books to get inspiration.  Inspiration for moods, for characters and character traits.  But obviously those aren't my only way of finding inspiration.

And to be honest, while those types of inspiration will color my mood, my primary inspirations are from within.  Take for example the 'Good Guy in the Wrong Place'.  It's one of my favorite scenarios to use.  The impetus for that scenario is me thinking of myself as a Good Guy (or at times a Good Girl).  So it's easy enough to draw upon that internal feeling and put it down into a cap or a story.  

But I believe that the most personal of inspirations can come from our own emotions.  We've all been happy before (although sometimes it's hard to remember those times).  We've all been sad (although thankfully it's sometimes hard to remember).  We've all been angry, indifferent, and aroused.  We've all been afraid, disgusted, and expectant.  And just because I was happy when I passed a test, doesn't mean I can't channel that happiness and use it in a character with a whole different scenario.  I can sit back and recall that joy I felt and use it to write out how happy a character is at getting his new breasts.

But for me personally, the most powerful emotion I can call upon is sadness.

Main Character Bio

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Diary vs Narration

I have to admit that after making that last post, I'm 100% on board with making "Language Barrier  into a story.  So I'm going to go ahead and lock that down.  I still have a ways to go before I start writing, but the more I post about it, the more I think about it.  And the more I think about it, the easier it is to iron out all the little details.

Just from the comments section I think I've nailed down the character and his group of friends as college age kids.  And yes, I'm old enough to call 20 and 21 year old people 'kids'!  Don't believe me?  Well what were you doing in 1995?  Because that's when I drank my first (legal) alcoholic beverage! Anywho... I think making them that age fits, and I can put them in Italy on a summer break.  Maybe they just got their baccalaureate degrees and are having a final fling before getting their careers started.

Some more thoughts and an initial outline

So I've been giving some more thought to how I would structure "Language Barrier" as a story.  The version of the story in the cap doesn't do much more than hit on the bullet points, which I guess is normal for most cap stories.   But for a long format story, I picture going into more detail on all of these bullet points.  All of those fun little diverting side stories now have room to grow.

For example, the story is about a guy getting transformed.  But who is he?  He can obviously afford a trip to Italy with his friends, but is he doing this as a college student?  As a business man?  Is he wealthy?  Cocky?  Shy?  None of that gets explored.  In a cap it doesn't need to be explored and in fact can't be explored.

But a story.... well I want to know this guy.  I want to know if I should be cheering on his unfair and unwilling transformation, or if I should be crying for his trials and tribulations.  I want to know who he was before the transformation and training, to see if he is in any way the same person after the transformation and training.  That smile that he let out at the drop of a hat with his friends... does he do that to his new master?  Does that love of fine wine and cheeses still exist when he's prancing around in panties and a bra?

Inspiration

So I promised I would post here more often and update you on the progress I'm making.  And even though I haven't started writing (not even an outline or backbone of the story), I AM still thinking about it.  You see, one thing I'm constantly doing is searching for inspiration.  That search isn't always for a story to follow or a transformation method... sometimes it's searching for moods and characters (and sometimes just for character traits).

The 'character' search comes from movies, books and television while the 'mood' search is often related to music.  I don't actively search these out, they just come from what I happen to be reading, watching or listening to.

When I'm sitting at the computer (either as Caitlyn or as Calvin), I constantly have music playing.  My taste in music is fairly eclectic, and only one thing remains constant.... diversity.  I honestly can't stand to listen to the same band or even the same genre of music one song after another.  For example, while I've been doing my normal web crawl this morning, I've listened to 24 songs.  Here are the last 10:

Some initial thoughts

I'm just having some thoughts and wanted to put them down here.

First thing... this is exactly the type of post I'm thinking will be common here.  By that I mean me kind of rambling about what I did or what I'm planning to do, but I also mean a pure text post.  I have to admit that it kind of bothers me to make a post without a title graphic for it.  Ever since I did that on "Caitlyn's Masks" I've enjoyed doing that.  The problem of course is that it does take some time to find a photo to use, and put it into my title graphic format.  Not A LOT of time.. but enough time that I might put off posting, and I don't want anything acting as a barrier.

Larvatus prodeo

Welcome to my new blog.... Caitlyn's Musings.

Technically, this is an extention of my capping blog; Caitlyn's Masks.  That blog primarily deals with my capping, and with me.  This blog will deal primarily with my writing... my story writing.

You see, I'm advancing.  I'm going to try my hand at writing longer stories.   I don't know where exactly where this is going to lead, as it's new for me.  I may become an author of TG/TF/CD/Sissy stories.  I may write more stories than I make caps... I may write an occasional story or two when the mood strikes me... I may write a single story a year, or fewer.  And of course I may completely fail at this endeavor.

But for the moment I'm willing to simply try.  That first tentantive step is the hardest for me... I don't like doing something and not doing it well, and the only way to know if I can write well is to try.  So not only is this new for me, it's also rather uncomfortable.

Now, if you know my capping work, you might be asking why I'm starting a new blog for this.  Afterall, I already have a successful blog.  It has a built in audience, it has just a hair under 300 'followers', and it's not as though I ONLY post caps there.  Well... I have several reasons.