Nine "Lasts"
- Cry: Last night (trying to watch a movie, pain and the emotion in the movie got to me)
- Beverage: Coffee with cream and sugar
- Kiss: New Years Day so... a month ago? And yes, it was family not intimate.
- Hug: Maybe the same? Maybe longer? I'm not much of a hugger in normal times.
- Movie Seen: Firestarter (both the 1984 and 2022 versions) last night.
- CD Played: Oh my god... years and years and years ago.
- Song Played: Eric Clapton's Forever Man is currently playing on my randomized list.
- Phone Call: A reminder call about a neurology appointment for next week
- Purchase: Coffee Mug (I broke my brother's beloved mug and found a replacement on E-bay).
Eight "Have You Evers"
- Dated A Best Friend: Nope. J might count, but we've only really seen each other as friends. I don't think of them as dates, but she might?
- Skinny Dipped: Nope.
- Kissed Somebody And Regretted It: Yes, in high school.
- Fallen In Love: Yes? Unrequited, and a long time ago.
- Lost Someone You Loved: Yes. I'd like to meet the person that can answer no to this. You lucky bastard.
- Been Depressed: Yes. Clinically and socially.
- Been Drunk And Thrown Up: Goddess, Yes.
- Ran Away: I quit a job once in a huff. Just up and told them "I quit" and walked out. That's the closest I can think of 'running away'.
Seven "States You’ve Been To"
- Maine
- Vermont
- New Hampshire
- Alaska
- Hawaii
- Oh wait... states I've BEEN to? Yeah, the above states are the only ones I have NOT BEEN to. :)
Six "Things You’ve Done Today"
- Made and drank coffee
- Smoked (cigarettes)
- Read the New York Times morning newsletter
- Played Connections (fun NYT game brain teaser)
- Caught up, some, on Discord
- Started catching up on blogs where I saw this post from Karrie and decided to copy it and began writing it out here.
Five "Favorite Things In No Order"
- Music
- Reading
- Being a nurse
- Friends / Being a friend
- Family
Four "People You Last Talked To In Person"
- Mom
- Brother R
- Brother B
- umm.... uh... wow... my nephew Z last week?
Three "Wishes"
- I wish my migraines could get under control
- I wish I could return to work and therefore 'normal' life
- I wish people could see things from other people's perspective
Two "Things you want to be when you grow up"
- I'll write about this below. It's not easy.
One "Thing you regret"
- Not going out on a limb more for love. I don't think I would have found it, but at least I could have truly 'loved and lost' as that's better than 'never loved'.
Okay, the 'things you want to be when you grow up'. It wasn't until that point that I realized this was made for someone younger. I just celebrated my 50th birthday last week. I'm certainly not 'old' or a 'senior' or anything like that. But I AM certainly about as 'grown up' as I'm going to get. I could say I want to be 'rich' but I was already financially independent and that's about the same thing. I could say I want to be 'happy' but I don't think that's what they were going for.
Sarah, for this question, wrote "Old and Happy". I thought about copying that, but honestly I'm not sure I want to get to be 'old'. Maybe it's the migraines speaking, but I'm worn out. I don't have the close relationships that many others do, I don't have many dreams to strive for. Between my migraines, my diabetes, and my simple age catching up, life isn't a smooth road any more and I don't think I want it to go on for much longer.
So, I guess if I HAVE to put something for "Things I want to be when I grow up" I'd say "Not Around Any Longer"
And yeah.... this was still fun, but it did depress me a bit.
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